All of my mommy friends with baby boys had warned me about getting peed on. I've heard stories of pee hitting walls, faces, family pets...so I was prepared for a human sprinkler when we brought Jack home from the hospital. I changed diapers really quickly. I have the Pee Pee Teepees. But he proved to be quite the little gentleman and I have gotten really relaxed about him being nakey.
Just this morning during our daily texts of 'ugh this is what my kids have done to drive me crazy so far today' with my closest mommy pal, she was telling me about getting peed on by her 5 month old month. I giggled. And then I bragged about Jack being a gentleman.
I sealed my doom in that final boast.
Although I'm on a strict diet, I guess the rest of my family still needs to eat, so we decided to brave the cold and snow for a grocery trip visit. I was completely dressed and ready, picked a warm outfit out for Jack, sat down in the living room floor to get him dressed, took off his diaper, stood him up because he likes standing without a diaper on....he smiled at me....and then used me as a urinal. A warm stream of pee hit me in the leg, arm, stomach. I screamed. He stopped. And then he finished peeing while Michael and Morgan watched and laughed.
Jack and I stared at each other for a few seconds. I was laughing and crying at the same time and he had a concerned look on his chubby little face, like he was trying to figure out if mommy had finally lost her mind.
I quickly put a diaper on him and assessed the damage. I had to strip off all of my clothes and find something else to wear, scrub the carpet, and clean the coffee table.