Sunday, March 23, 2014

Glam Moms

So I've noticed that some moms look like they've stepped out of the pages of a magazine or from a Pinterest post that belongs under my board 'make me pretty' and I have a bone to pick with you...

No I really don't. 

I have a love / hate relationship with you. 

You look amazing for a mom and I love that you are proof that motherhood isn't the end of all things glamorous. 

But I also hate you for making me feel self conscious for looking like I rolled out of a dumpster. 

I used to spend my evenings after work going to the gym, walking around the park, going to the tanning bed, getting my hair done, shopping for Facebook selfies were frequent due to hair and makeup being perfect all the time. 



I'm a stay at home mom and I spend my evenings (and mornings and afternoons...) running kids to preschool, dance, gymnastics, church, and soon, soccer. Throw in trips to the doctor, the pharmacy, the grocery store, the liquor store (I kid...) and every so often a trip to the mall...where we eat mall pizza and browse 2 stores before Morgan tries dancing with a mannequin and Jack starts screaming because well, he's a guy and he hates the mall. 

Now I get my haircut about twice a year and do my own coloring. Whenever my gray stripe starts to show I jokingly blame it on Elsa (ya know, the newest Disney princess who has powers to freeze everything and accidentally freezes her sister's heart causing a white streak in her hair...).  Do I enjoy locking myself in the bathroom huffing chemicals while coloring my own hair? No way. But it saves so much time and money. And scares away my children for half hour. 'Mommy looks freaky with paint on her head!'

Now instead of going to the gym for an hour or walking around the park enjoying my iPod, I get to do yoga at home with 2 kids and 2 cats climbing over and under and around me; do Zumba or kickboxing videos while trying not to step on your kick kids and cats; or escape to my treadmill in the cold basement. And then I usually eat my feelings afterwards. 

So to the moms that prance around with perfectly cut and highlighted hair, lovely manicured nails, stylish clothes (that match!), and wear more than Chapstick, congratulations on making time for yourself. You look amazing. I'm usually wearing a Dr Who shirt (or honey badger don't care shirt...or t-rex hates push-ups...), yoga pants from Family Dollar stuffed down into snow boots (or flip flops, depending on the season), messy hair in a bun with Elsa stripe shining, Chapstick, nails cut short to prevent injuring children, dark circles under eyes and a confused sleepy expression. 

And Jack doesn't look much better...cause he's usually in a diaper. 

But dang it Morgan always looks cute! She's got a closet and dresser full of adorable clothes and she's my 42 inch tall American Girl doll that I love to style every morning for school. 

She usually looks like this:

While Jack looks like this:

And I usually look like this: